Me, Myself and Yo

A neverland for my mind where my id rules and my ego and super-ego can stay away!

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Saturday, July 08, 2006

THE I-WANT-IT-NOW COUNTRY

I was talking to a friend today and he said something that stuck in my mind for the rest of the day: “This is a short-term minded country.”

Boy, was he soooo right!

We are being burned-out by time! The United States of America, which coincidentally we call the U.S. for short, is a place where we –almost all of us–look for the short-term, fast and immediate gratification, solution or answer. Don’t think so? Hmmmm… Well let’s quickly look at the facts. Let’s start by understanding what short-term means, because it can be interpreted in several ways. For instance:

Short-term may take the form of a product which may make you lose 10 pounds in a week.

It can also mean that the line at the fast-food restaurant promises to be no longer than 2 minutes, and your order takes no longer than 3 minutes to be served.

Short-term means that relationships are made in a blink, and sometimes only last for a fling.

Ah yes, it can also be why microwaves work on high-mode all the time.

Short-term represents instant gratification, immediate pleasure… Short-term is the “here”; short-term is the “right now.”

No tomorrow, no future, no planning. Now! It is based on the supply and demand system. Supply and options are so abundant that the demander just needs to snap his fingers and voilá, everything is already served. It’s the era of the prostitution of love, the prostitution of flavors, the prostitution of quality, and then why not, the prostitution of time.

Oh yes, some call this: CONVENIENCE. I forgot about that but hey, convenience based on what? That’s just impatience reframed as something nice sounding.

In a short-term society, it is more convenient to opt for liposuction instead of exercising properly? Yes, you’re right, how could three hours and some two-weeks of increasingly dreadful pain compete against a whole life of sport-filled action? No comparison. I’ll look better in my bikini next month so… Let’s do it now!

Yes, we value instant gratification more. But why? Some say it is in our psyche.

According to Freud, who happens to be one of the smartest mind decoders ever, we humans, have three levels of consciousness: the id, the ego and the super-ego.

The id (which I call instant desires) has to do with the programming of our primitive emotions and needs. It requires and looks for immediate gratification. It is ruled by the pleasure principle, regardless of any undesirable consequences.

The ego, the conscious side, understands that satisfying a need is not always possible when based on a reality principle. The ego helps to suppress our id’s urgent needs until they can be fulfilled. The ego creates defense mechanisms to keep our id in line.

However, we have the third level, which is the super-ego. The super-ego is ruled by the conscience on one hand, which basically knows what is right and what isn’t, and on the other hand by the ‘ego ideal’, which represents the goals of a person, those instilled and morally accepted by the society.

Therefore, I dare say that if the individual has these levels of consciousness, then so too can a group of people and therefore, a country.

Here’s a related example of how these three levels work: If a society is based on freedom and misunderstands that concept as being able to do whatever it feels like doing, then the super-ego sees this pleasure as a morally permissible condition and the id will rule every individual’s actions up to the point that consequences will be reflected in the social collective. So what’s the ego up to then? Reframing our id? Not really, the super-ego is in charge. Any regrets will be replaced by a nice rationalized excuse that this behavior is morally accepted so there’s no need for a suppressive action from the ego.

The more id oriented the inhabitants of a country, the more instant gratification, short-term centered the country will be. The more impatient we become, the lesser effort we will exert to do things. Instincts will start to govern us and we will need to satisfy them even sooner… or paradoxically, we’ll loose control.

And this applies to every aspect of life: sex, love, hunger, sleep…

I want “love” now. So I go to a bar, meet somebody, we click, and then we go to bed… “Pow”… The cycle happens again. “Sorry, I met somebody else, bye”… "See ya”, tears… Move on… Next!

I know, this may sound soooo conspiracy theorish… Perhaps “trivial”, but it’s not! In order for some semblance of a healthy balance to exist, there needs to be a component of self-sacrifice in the equation. It is a ritual we need. Sacrifice is fundamental for value creation. So we had sex. We made “love”… True… But we didn’t sweat for it, therefore we didn’t value the moment in context… Most usually end up feeling they rushed into something they were not sure about in the first place. “Why couldn’t I control it?” That is what I call an ego asleep on the job. The defense mechanism should have kicked in right away. But oh, wait, the super-ego says that somehow this is now socially acceptable. It’s about being free, right? What a conflict! Ok, let’s blame it on the alcohol!

We can’t fully enjoy instant gratification without balancing it with some form of perceived sacrificing! There is a famous teaching in business and in philosophy that states… You can’t satisfy good price, high quality and fast service, all together. You must sacrifice one. If you want high quality but want it cheap, it will take time. If you want something of quality but want it fast, then you’ll have to pay a higher price. But if you want it NOW and cheap, it is usually at the cost of sacrificing quality. You can’t expect to have the three together!

And this rule applies to any-thing! Even a baby needs a nine months’ gestation period, at least!

So, what are we really sacrificing by adopting instant gratification as our ruler? Not time, certainly. I mean, when we say “fast”, we really want to hear “right now”. We don’t want to wait at all, or exert any effort on our part. We just want to “get it”. We might accept hours, days… but weeks? Mmmmh… No… Months? Unacceptable!

Oh, yes, I hear you: Internet. Yes, we do have instant messaging, instant music, even instant cyber-sex… yes, instant access to many high quality things for a very affordable price. This contradicts the rule! So you think you can have the three? You may see it as getting something “at a value” because our super-ego says so, but reality is, if you want a song from iTunes, for instance, you had to pay for the computer, the internet access, the iTunes sotfware, the piece of music…and all together… Well, just add up the costs! It may not have been that cheap after all, was it? High quality? Of course. Fast? Certainly! Convenient? Maybe, but there was an investment involved.

As long as we are driven by the immediate satisfaction of our desires, there is no mental homeostasis at a conscious level and that, my friends, is what rules our today, our hours, our minutes, our seconds, our milliseconds, our nanoseconds and we end up paying the consequences tomorrow, but who cares? Today is today.

Anyway, while tomorrow arrives slowly, I‘m going to get some “Mac in the micro”. After all, I am hungry, but as long as I’m “eating”, I guess socially I am ok, or am I? My id says “yes, pleeeeeease.”

12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is great and so true. We do, as a society for the most part opt for what is fast, easy and convenient. Really enjoyed it. Will look forward to reading more.

12/7/06 4:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I never stop and think about how the US is today, but what you wrote was very much how many people truly are. I enjoy reading your writings and feel like I learn so much and am able to see different things from different perspectives. Love it, love it...

12/7/06 6:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Balance is what is missing from this society. People overdose in everything. This same article could have been written on the subject of clothing (on how people have too much), on wasteful eating practices... One of these days... Somebody will sell people "balance". And time will return to a steady pace.

13/7/06 12:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great! That's why I love the Italian culture! They really appreciate the meaning of time and quality...I'm not too sure about love, but like you said "You must sacrifice one".

13/7/06 10:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes, yes, so tue. But - what will I do about this? WHat will you, dear reader, do about this? What needs to be changed in my life today? How can I act differently today so that others may see my example - and, eventually, perhaps change their own behavior. Let's face it, instant gratification is a powerful drug, yes?

13/7/06 12:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Correction: Yes, yes, so TRUE...

13/7/06 12:14 PM  
Blogger Gabby said...

And expensive too, jeffe, and expensive too.

13/7/06 2:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Gabby, not only is this very true but I like how you "frame" it.
:-) Thanks for the insight. Que calladito te lo tenías. I look forward to reading more.

14/7/06 11:59 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yea so we want things right away, what’s wrong with that? The movement of the world is to want things instantly to produce products faster. To create blogs so that one can reach many people at once and have them respond instantaniously. Faster high speed Internet, mobile phones, microwaves, etc. Americans are not the only ones who have these things or produce them. Technology benefits everyone for example those how suffer with diabetes, todays meters are faster and better. On the other end a woman can know tell whether she’s pregnant within a week HA. I think like you, people tend to forget that people are not machines; we expect them to give us instantly the results we want. They cannot be programmed like a DVR or Computers. People are complicated, I know I am, and so I chose to slow down sometimes and try to understand why we are all so different and also enjoy the beauty in that. This planet moves so slowly yet it’s creatures run circles around her!
How many words per minute can you type? Who long before you put up a new topic? Just kidding. Love You

16/7/06 2:03 PM  
Blogger Gabby said...

Soon... I'm burned-out by time! ;-)

17/7/06 11:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG. You´re absolutely right.
At the end of the day, or life, short-term happiness doesn´t mean the same for someone who really values effort and commitment. That is what life and success is about.
Congrat´s, I´ll be waiting for the next one.

18/7/06 5:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I scrolled straight to the bottom so my id would be satiated by leaving a comment...aaaahhh..that feels better...

now I will go read your lovely words ;)

much love,
Alexis

3/8/06 11:50 PM  

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